Due to my conviction, however, I have boxed up so many at a time and gone and sold them for a pathetically low price that hopefully someone else will appreciate and be able to take them home and enjoy. I am making a list of the ones I want to get again, just on blu-ray and not on dvd.
It feels so ridiculous that material objects can remind us so much of certain moments in our lives. I remember when Park Meadows mall first opened and my family went to see it, I had an old dime copy of the hobbit, with a mustard colored sheaf. Whenever I look at that book I can still remember hopping out of the car, trying to stuff into my blue shoulder purse and telling my dad, my favorite chapter was where Bilbo is overhearing the trolls talking about mutton stew.
Show me a movie and I'll tell you another memory entwined with it.
I am trying to start fresh with certain things, I want to let them go and be able to say, "Ok, let's do this again."
Not to mention, I still have a few movies I have never seen and would like to investigate.
Dr. Frankenstien being one of them.
I watched it for the first time a few weeks ago and it being a "blah" day, merely sat in a vegetable state staring at it in a monotone thinking, "I don't get it, I don't really care.. Thank god I have drawing to keep me occupied while suffering through this.."
However, since then I have watched it twice more and there is something about it... that.. has grown on me.
I think I was so against it at first because it was different, and I have a hard time dealing with change. I have always struggled with change, so much that even when I started taking theater classes, the hardest part for me was improv games because I didn't know how to just let go, and... go with the flow. I have learned A LOT since those days, and now, after sitting and letting Dr. Frankenstein steep on the back burner of my mind, I am watching it now, and enjoying it.
I notice a difference in growing accustomed to things you choose to change in your life and things that are just thrown on you that you have to just accustumbrate yourself to. The former is of your own will and desire, and with patience can be accomplished and enjoyed or moved on from. But something that is just thrown at you and you have to bite the bullet and just deal with... It has to be learned to love. Things that are thrown at us in life, I like to call those lemons.
I have learned to love them, but I will never settle for them. I don't ever want to settle for a lemon, I want to end up with something I looked for and that I can tell myself, "This is what life handed me, but this is what I want.." And go.....
I wish the same for you all as well. I wish that despite the lemons strewn across your path in life, you are able to look past them and still be able to search out the things you want and go after them.
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